Tip 1: Do not chase after him. If you are contemplating following him around or keeping tabs on him so that you can coincidentally show up at the same place as him then, please try and stay away from this tactic. If you push too hard then you will run the risk of alienating yourself from him. Here the negatives by far outweigh the positives if you are considering using the tactic of stalking.

Tip 2: Use the time away from your ex boyfriend to work on yourself. You need to turn around all the negative emotions and turn it into something positive again. Being positive can only help you when trying to get your boyfriend back.

One way to get rid of all these negative emotions is to write a letter to your boyfriend. Write about all the good times you had as well as all the hurt you experienced. Furthermore, write down things you might not have said to your boyfriend but always wanted to but did not get the chance to say it. Let out all of your emotions on paper. Then burn the letter. By burning the letter you will close the chapter on that part of your relationship.

After burning the letter only focus on the good times you had in the relationship and on the things which made your relationship strong. And also these are the only things you should talk about when you do talk to your ex boyfriend. Avoid fighting and talking about those things which ended the relationship.

Tip 3: Focus on your strengths and weaknesses. Consider improving on those things which you’re ex boyfriend always praised you on. For example, you’re cooking.

Nevertheless, also work on those things which you’re ex boyfriend complained about.

As you can see it is important to focus on the positive aspects of the relationship and not on all the negatives. Moreover, also important is to use the time away from your ex boyfriend to work on yourself and not only chasing after him.

Just remember that this is just one technique you can use to get your ex too respond to your calls, messages or emails. However you still need to have an overall plan or strategy you can follow if you want to win them back.

Firstly – What NOT to Say!

Usually this falls into two categories which are the Plead and the Emergency. With the Plead you contact your ex and just go on pleading them excessively to please contact you and with the Emergency you fabricate a situation to let it seems that there is an emergency and that your ex must call you immediately.

As you can see for yourself using these two techniques is certainly the wrong way to do it as it will certainly backfire on you. And if you use the Emergency method on a consistent basis you will create for yourself a scenario where your ex will just think you are crying wolf again. And we all know that story.

The Power of Curiosity & Self Interest

Curiosity and self interest is certainly two of the most powerful forces of the human psyche. So you need to combine these two forces together to your advantage. If you do this you will certainly always get your ex to return your communications.

Example:

“Hi, Ben. It is me Jacky. I just wanted to let you know I appreciate what you did for me and I would like it if you can call me because I would like to thank you in person.”

As you can see in the above example both Curiosity and self interest is being used. Surely Ben won’t resist responding because he would like to know what he did that makes Jacky appreciative. And of course this message is much more positive than the plead or emergency message.

Warning!

Now before you make the call you still need to do some thinking work because you need to figure out what your ex did that you appreciate. It can be something small but it needs at least to be plausible.

As you can see this technique will work for you but it is important to set things up first by figuring out what you are going to say when your ex do contact you. You must do this before you use this technique.

And the most important thing to remember this is only one technique you can use in conjunction with an overall plan or strategy to win your ex back. Because what we want to do is to have long term success and not just hit and runs. And if you use this technique without careful planning you will have success when it comes to your ex returning your calls, messages or emails but it will inevitably be only short term success.

So think things through and get a strategy in place before using this technique.

The worse thing that can happen when you are longing to get back with your ex is that when you do get them back the results of the relationship is exactly the same as the first time. And this may conceivably lead to another break up. So it is important to lay a strong foundation for the relationship the second time around.

Here are 4 tips you can use with your foundation building:

1. Analyze the mistakes made during the relationship. Find out why it was made and why it impacted on your relationship. You need to do this because you are basically starting the relationship from scratch. So you need to do things differently and better the second time around. You must have the mantra of “I’m still in love with my ex, so I am going to do it better than before.”

2. Become friends with your ex. You must however take it slow because if your ex suspects you only want to be friends to try and get back together with them they more than likely will be more resistant to the idea.  So just take it slow and let your friendship and relationship grow naturally.

3. Have a positive attitude. You don’t want your ex to view you as a depressing person. You need to show them you moved on and are happy. This will have a better impact on your ex if they decide to get back together with you, because they would rather have someone who is happy and not depressed in their lives.

4. Picture what type of person you would like to be with as well as if your ex would also like to be with such a person. Remember it is human nature to want to be with someone who makes you happy and who makes you feel loved and special. To be with someone who is there for you when you need them. This is the type of person you must strive to become for your ex.

If you follow these tips you will build a foundation where you become valuable to your ex as well as make them feel valuable. And there is no better way to say “I’m still in love with my ex” than by ensuring you have a strong foundation to build your new relationship on and by showing the desire to make it last forever.

But you must never be naive and think a breakup is not possible and it will never happen to you. The reality is that breakups do happen and even though some breakups are unfortunately necessary, other breakups can be undone and the relationship can be salvaged. If you ever do go through a breakup or are currently going through one here are some tips on how to win your ex back.

1 – Clear your head. If you let your mind be consumed with the breakup you will not be able to think clearly about what you need to do to win your ex back. If you cannot clear your head your ex will also know that you are taking the breakup badly. By clearing your head you will improve your communication with your ex because you will not be consumed by having a one way conversation with your ex that only pertains to how you want them back.

2 – Do not sell yourself out. I know after a breakup that the urge to go and beg your ex to take you back or apologizing just for the sake of apologizing will be strong. But you must rather start focusing on being strong and focus on doing fine without your ex. By calming down and focusing on these things you will now be able to get their attention again allot better.

3 – Create that wow factor. To do this you need to move away from the old you. Change things up by losing weight or working out more. Make more positive changes to your life and surely your ex will notice your new image and respond well to the changes.

4 – Do not forget. The past is the past but you must always remember and never forget the reasons for your breakup. You can turn what went wrong in your relationship into a positive by making sure you use it as a learning experience. By doing this and by taking your mistakes and the mistakes made in the relationship to heart you can ensure that you do not make them again whatever happens in your future relationships. Be it with your ex or with someone else.

5 – Establish a plan. Finally, “how to win your ex back?” you need a plan. By following a plan you will improve your chances tenfold to get your ex back. With a plan you will avoid making emotional decisions and only allow yourself to think logically and more importantly behaving and operating that way as well.