For one thing you must remind yourself that there was a reason that you broke up in the first place. And if you skip this step you run the danger of making the same mistakes again. You do not want this to happen because ultimately you want to get back together with your ex forever and not just temporarily.

It is therefore important not to only think about the good times after the break up but also to force yourself to look past the loneliness and also think about the problems and frustrations you faced during the relationship.

Be honest during this step and assess what you want out of the relationship. Here you can weigh up the good with the bad before making any decisions about the future of the relationship.

The reality is that some relationships are better left broken up. These are the relationships where there is more fighting than loving. After all couples need to make each other happy and if this is not the case when you and your ex are together then you should maybe consider moving on.

After you did your soul searching and you still want to get back together with your ex then all is not lost. You certainly can salvage the relationship after a break up.

Firstly you should avoid stalking your ex. Not only stalking in the sense of following them around but also to not repeatedly bombard them with phone calls, emails and text messages. Even following them on social networking sites falls under the category of stalking. Avoid this act of desperation.

Secondly when you do speak with your ex avoid pleading and begging them to take you back. Although you may feel bad about things which happened in the past you need to look past this and look to the future and concentrate on that instead.

At present the relationship is over but the presence is where you can make a difference so avoid doing things which may hurt your chances going forward in your effort to get back together with your ex.

Give them some space and when you do talk with your ex bring up the fun times you had together and the things you like about them.

“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” – Albert Einstein.

If you want to get back together with ex this quote has so much meaning regarding your situation.

The biggest mistake being made today when it comes to couples reconciling either in a marriage or in any other relationship is when they think they can just pick up the relationship where it ended and just pretend that everything is fine again and that nothing happened.

So be before you even attempt to get back together with your ex you need to ask yourself what makes you think that things will be different this time around?

The tough questions need to be answered. Questions like: Was it something you did or maybe both of you did that caused the relationship to fall apart? Did you take too long to resolve your issues? What on your part could you have done to change things?

If you were mainly responsible for the relationship not working out you owe it to yourself and your ex to sort out any problems you had prior to the break up. You need to address whatever personal issues you had before even contemplating wanting to get back together with your ex.  If you don’t take this step chances are the relationship will just follow the same path again.

If you’re ex were the one who had some issues you need to make sure they have taken steps to resolve these issues. If your ex don’t work on their own issues it is conceivable that you will wind up dealing with these issues all over again.

If the issues stem from both of you then the two of you should consider relationship counseling to help you with these issues and ensure you start the new relationship on the right foot.

You really should take this advice to heart especially if you want to avoid future pain and another broken heart. And when you do want to get back together with your ex you clearly still love your ex and you want the relationship to work.

So address the things that caused the relationship to end and stop the cycle of insanity!